“We, who have the comforts of functionally being perceived as straight, are pissed off that no one sees us as weirdos?” yeah, & the people who think of us this way forget that perception isn’t lived reality, & while this perception protects us from violence on the street, it also harms us by erasing structural violence enacted upon us.
but ofc, these people are often unaware of the structural violence enacted upon us because of the same invisibility & dismissal
I appreciate just being. Being one’s authentic self in the universe, being seen with question or challenge. Being with needing to justify or explain. Being without having to make someone else understand or accept. Being weird or not. The right and freedom and safety to just be.
I think a complicating factor is that gay and lesbian *culture*-- independent of any given individual's views-- is consumed by the idea of the "straight gaze." This is understandable, in that how straight people choose to react when they pay attention to queers has major consequences. But it misses the experience that bisexual people have of being subject to the "queer gaze" as well as the "straight gaze."
I think that under the queer gaze, bisexuals as a group are definitely Freaks. We deviate from the supposed purity of same-gender desire and the assumed kind of life that leads to.
I know that for me, I don't at all want straight people to think I'm weird. I'm cool with being invisible to them, outside of contexts where awareness actually makes a difference to my health or economic outcomes.
What I want is for queer people to *not* think that I'm weird. To not force me to perform transgression or camp or showy radical politics as a condition of accepting my desires and loyalties as real.
“We, who have the comforts of functionally being perceived as straight, are pissed off that no one sees us as weirdos?” yeah, & the people who think of us this way forget that perception isn’t lived reality, & while this perception protects us from violence on the street, it also harms us by erasing structural violence enacted upon us.
but ofc, these people are often unaware of the structural violence enacted upon us because of the same invisibility & dismissal
I appreciate just being. Being one’s authentic self in the universe, being seen with question or challenge. Being with needing to justify or explain. Being without having to make someone else understand or accept. Being weird or not. The right and freedom and safety to just be.
Sending good wishes for your personal matters.
I think a complicating factor is that gay and lesbian *culture*-- independent of any given individual's views-- is consumed by the idea of the "straight gaze." This is understandable, in that how straight people choose to react when they pay attention to queers has major consequences. But it misses the experience that bisexual people have of being subject to the "queer gaze" as well as the "straight gaze."
I think that under the queer gaze, bisexuals as a group are definitely Freaks. We deviate from the supposed purity of same-gender desire and the assumed kind of life that leads to.
I know that for me, I don't at all want straight people to think I'm weird. I'm cool with being invisible to them, outside of contexts where awareness actually makes a difference to my health or economic outcomes.
What I want is for queer people to *not* think that I'm weird. To not force me to perform transgression or camp or showy radical politics as a condition of accepting my desires and loyalties as real.