Here is paradox that lives in my brain: I think bisexual representation is often pointless and unhelpful, and yet I think bisexual representation is a crucial aspect of bisexual liberation.
I think a lot of things that are associated with advocating for bi people — talking about bisexual scenes and characters in books and movies, making lists of Famous Bisexuals Throughout History, the dreaded Bisexual Mythbusting™️ — are really stupid and not getting us anywhere, and yet I think that going too hard on these things, trying to distance one’s self from them, is a sign of biphobia (internalized or otherwise).
In my head, none of this feels contradictory, but I feel like I should explain.
Yesterday I got sent a list of “excellent bisexual comics,” which made me tired as soon as I read the opener, for reasons that dovetail with what I was writing about yesterday:
Bisexual comics can be hard to find. You want a list of queer comics to read? No problem. How about Sapphic graphic novels? Easy. But when it comes to looking for bisexual representation in comics specifically, that can be a bit more challenging. Unless a character’s sexuality is explicitly stated or is a part of a storyline (we see them date people of multiple genders, for example), it can be tricky to determine a character’s LGBTQ identity. I can definitively say that two girls dating are Sapphic. But are they bi, pan, ace, or lesbians? I don’t know. I could assume, but that’s never a great thing to do.
Who cares if you assume that a fictional character is bisexual? Who cares if you assume that they are pan or ace or lesbian? We’re not talking about real people here — it doesn’t actually matter if in your head canon, every character played by Andy Samberg is 100% bisexual and just not addressing it onscreen; they’re fictional characters and you’re allowed to think whatever you want about them. There’s a contingent of folks who think Luke Skywalker is gay and a contingent who think he is ace and probably a group who think he’s a gay ace and the beautiful thing is that they can all be right because you’re allowed to have your own personally meaningful interpretation of a fictional character. In some ways it would almost be worse if George Lucas got up and definitively answered the question, removed all ability for fans to project themselves onto Luke by fixing him in one specific sexual identity.
So there’s that. And yet. I cannot deny that a lack of stories where characters are openly bi, a lack of stories that portray romantic fluidity on the page, is a sign of a problem. I loved when Dead to Me allowed Judy to just start dating a woman because she was attracted to one (I mean who wouldn’t be attracted to Natalie Morales, rawr); I love the way Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn are eventually drawn to each other and are able to form a romantic relationship without disavowing their past relationships with men. I love when bisexuality exists on the page and screen, visible and yet understated, allowed to be a part of the story without being The Story™️. I love these moments, these stories, and yet to corral them into a list of Great Bisexual Moments feels almost to cheapen them, to box them into a little category, shove them into their tight little corner, rather than simply allowing them to exist as a depiction of how humans are, of the complexity of sex and love and attraction.
I feel similarly about these discussions of Great Bisexuals of History. Like: yes, it’s deeply important to recognize that bisexuality has always existed, that there have always been humans with multigender attractions, because that’s just a basic fact. But when it that boils down to arguing about whether historical figures with obviously queer attractions were bi or gay — or, even worse, creating a Bros-like “Hall of Bisexuals” — it feels like we’re kind of missing the point. Like, who gives a shit whether that pile of dry bones was a gaybones or a bibones, you know? It won’t change how mustard tastes.
I think what I’m getting at here is this: bi invisibility is a problem, because it generally means that the mere possibility that people might be attracted to multiple genders — that a single crush, a single relationship, cannot encapsulate the full range of someone’s identity but only indicate where they are in that one moment in time — has been rendered taboo, that multigender attraction has been pushed the margins of polite society.
But so many attempts at bi visibility wind up creating new problems by buying into this idea of human sexuality as a Linnean categorization project. In attempting to render bisexuality visible there is far too much emphasis on making it legible — and in the process, we wind up reducing bisexuality, making it smaller, sadder, more limited than it actually is. The whole point of bisexual liberation is to allow everyone — not just Out Bisexuals™️, but everyone — the freedom to be messy, to not know what the future holds, to be okay with falling in love, in lust, with a new person even if they veer dramatically from your past “type.” Bisexual liberation isn’t simply about creating a society that accepts the freaky deeks who like to go both ways; it’s about recognizing that being in a relationship (or opting not to be in any relationship at all!) is about what makes us happy in the moment, and not about the creation of some fixed identity.
But to get to the point where we can have that freedom, we also have to get past this hurdle where bisexuality itself is taboo, where being openly bisexual is looked down upon and burdened with shame. And I think you do have to have the bi books and bi movies and openly bi politicians in order to get to that point. The question is, how do you do that without falling into the trap of treating bisexuality like it’s just one more box that people can slot themselves into after ticking off a few checkboxes, rather than a blank canvas on which we all have the freedom the create our own lives, our own journeys, however we see fit?
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This is fabulously insightful, optimistic and visionary writing, especially this bit below - gives hope for the future, thank you
“The whole point of bisexual liberation is to allow everyone — not just Out Bisexuals™️, but everyone — the freedom to be messy, to not know what the future holds, to be okay with falling in love, in lust, with a new person..”